Q&A

Here’s a list of Questions & Answers that stir in the minds of those who awaken to their full potential.

Note: All answers are from me and my guides. There isn’t ever one REAL answer. So I always suggest for you to find the answer within yourself first, and then observe how others see it. This way you train yourself to listen to your own guidance and honor that. If you have a question you’d like to see posted please go to the Contact us page. Also visit my links to see videos and more Q&A’s.

List of Questions:
Q: How does one become a Medium/Intuitive?
Q: Do you see dark spirits or believe in evil (demons)?
Q: Why do people that I don’t know (meaning I wasn’t born yet) come in, or why do other family members who aren’t related come in at the same time?
Q: How can you do a reading for me over instant chat, or typing it. Don’t you need my voice, or to be in my energy field?
Q: Mediumship goes against my religious beliefs.
Q: Should I always take their (those who’ve passed over) advice and are they all knowing?
Q: How can I get the best reading possible?
Q: What do spirits look like?
Q: I heard having a near death experience or tragedy facilitates intuitiveness?
Q: You talk about those who’ve passed over like their right here and not in heaven?
Q: I’m scared of death and dying.
Q: How do you recieve your information from my loved one whose passed over?
Q: How can I understand what I’m receiving?
Q: How do I know that there still around me or do I need you to tell them I said hi?
Q: Do you hear voices all the time and when you’re doing my reading whose talking?
Q: Am I required to know my family lineage?
Q: What ‘tools’ do you use in facilitating your conversations with those who’ve passed over?
Q: I’m scared to get a reading as this is my first time, what should I expect?
Q: What if my loved ones speak a different language than what you know? Can you hear them? 

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Q: How does one become a Medium/Intuitive?:

A: This questions was asked by a 10yr old and I loved the expression on his face when he heard my answer. As I said, “if you want to do this, the one thing you can do to enhance your skill, is to learn how to listen.” Of course, that might of sounded like something a parent would say, but I should of elaborated, then again I was in the company of a young one who doesn’t need more information. When I say ‘listen’, I don’t mean with your ears. Sometimes it’s good to start that way so you can open your sensory system, but be gentle with yourself and by all means do it in a quiet environment where your nervous system can safely register everything you download. As you can read on my main Mediumship link, there are all different ways to listen. Sometimes it’s through sight, other times through smell, hearing, touching. But most often the overall way to listen, is to trust what you get before the story. The more you trust, the more you’ll hear. Also check in with your client, to find out if you’re on track or not. It’s all a process in retraining your brain/body in how to receive information.

Q: Do you see dark spirits or believe in evil (demons)?:

A: I personally don’t believe in evil the way most people do. I don’t believe there is anything out there to get you, then again when I was young I was scared to death of this concept. Someone once said, that if you were walking down an alleyway at night, you feel the ‘darkness/evil’ and feel it everywhere, but then why is it when it’s light you don’t? It’s our beliefs, it’s the mind saying if this happens it’s ‘bad’. That’s what fear is and the ego feeds on it. I believe that there is no such thing as good and bad, there just is. When I do readings, I’ve always come across the happiest people, even when their life on earth was a complete disaster.

In several readings I’ve found it interesting that even though I normally see light beings (orbs) all day, I would see these smokey dark wispy clouds stream on in. I soon realized a thread, that they were all family or close ones for my client, who have crossed over. Meaning they weren’t just angels or guides. So imagine my surprise of thinking, ‘Oh crap, what portal did I open’, yet they came in so gently and loving I realized they were my client’s family members and I was honored to hold the space for them to appear. So in summery black doesn’t mean ‘dark’, as long as it’s understood that dark doesn’t mean bad.

Q: Why do people that I don’t know (meaning I wasn’t born yet) come in, or why do other family members who aren’t related come in at the same time?:

A: We are all one. There is the theory (which I believe in), that suggests we are all one. One being, but what is failed to be elaborated is that we are all one, but with a trillion personalities. It’s like a tree, we’re the leaves and each is unique and offers something to the whole, not in its doing but in its being. And that tree is ALL of us so, when other people come into a reading from the other side and for someone else, it’s your relative usually paving the way for them to get through to someone who might never get a reading, you’re a conduit, just as I am. So, you can be ecstatic that your relatives would be so kind in their offering. As for people coming in that you didn’t know of since you might not of been born yet, it’s all our silly thinking regarding time. There is no time, plain and simple especially on the other side, or as many call it: heaven. If I go into all this, it’s going to be a huge book about Quantum Physics, which I suggest you look up if you’re interested. To put it mildly, we’re all one, ALL connected and there is no hell. All hell is, is our own suffering. Sorry, as I know this comment will spark confusion. Just remember this is my opinion and experience.

Q: How can you do a reading for me over instant message, or typing it? Don’t you need my voice, or to be in my energy field?:

A: No I’m just that good, jk!!!! Actually it’s all energy, I don’t need to be in close proximity to you as sometimes that helps but sometimes it hinders it as it’s too emotional and then they don’t come through as forwardly. Fact is, the answer lies in what I do, as how do you think I connect with your relatives? Do I need to hear their voice or go visit them in heaven? Wow that would be cool, but sorry I don’t have that superpower. All I do is listen. I’ve trained myself in practicing how to listen and it doesn’t come through our 5 senses. It’s like a thought but not through the brain. Similar to when you all of a sudden think something or remember something out of the blue. Kind of like that. The trick is to be able to cipher out your own thoughts from the thoughts being given.

Q: Mediumship goes against my religious beliefs.:

A: Good, it’s great to question EVERYTHING. That’s what I do when I do a reading. I ask for clear communication and I will not fish for anything. If the information isn’t ringing true for the individual I’m reading and I’m not getting it screamed into my ear (which happens when the client isn’t getting it), I toss it. I just don’t believe that we have to grab for anything, if it’s so important they’ll find a different way to communicate it to you. As for mediumship going against your religious beliefs, I respect that but like I said, I believe to question everything not through cynicism, but through the heart. To find what works for you, not anyone else, just for you. Of course talking to dead people brings out the skeptics, it should. I love when people who are skeptically observe what I do. It’s not that they come to conclusion and agree with me, at all. It’s that they see, this isn’t a party trick. This is real for me and my client. This isn’t meant to convince you, it’s for you to open your mind and see there are many different experiences.

Q: Should I always take their (those who’ve passed over) advice and are they all knowing???:

A: No, plain and simple. Here’s the deal, usually most people who’ve journeyed onward come through for you, as you remember them. So, if I’m doing a reading with a child and parent, the parent will almost always come in as their earth based personality, so you would recognize them. I’ll tell ya I had some real tough mothers who came in and just got down to business, and then afterward they’d get to the lovey dovey part. First of all they LOVE you, as this is the state of which we are made up of. So, that’s not even in question. When they come through and give advice, it’s to be taken just like if they we’re here on earth. Usually we don’t listen to our parents especially here on earth. And sometimes, well mostly they do give great advice, but we have free will. So, take advice with discernment yet know it’s coming from a well of love, regardless of your relationship with their personality when in body. But sometimes they say things that can be so rash only to make you do opposite. For example, I had a reading where the mother passed and one of the adult children asked a question about if what she’s doing was right. The mom, being her personality perfectly, said NO! Well imagine my surprise and as hurtful it was to relay that info (I will not alter anything I’m given just to make you feel good, but I will protect your sensitivity as much as I can). As I felt so bad for this client I had time to reflect on this. After about 2 weeks of being distraught, I realized the client NEEDED her mom to say ‘no’, so she would do the opposite. She always did the opposite of what her mom said here on earth, so if her mom said, ‘oh yes honey, do it!’ the client probably would of second guessed it all and not done it. It was divine and humorous all at the same time.

Q: How can I get the best reading possible?:

A: Relax and don’t need it to be the best possible. Just relax your mind, as it’s going to race so just allow your body to do its thing. The less attention on it the better. By the way, I’m not a mind reader so I can’t read your mind or guess what you’re thinking. That would be some serious talent, what I do is listen to the information given, your loved ones who’ve passed on and my angels/guides. The best readings happen when we’re the least emotionally charged. Usually I won’t do readings right when someone passes away not because I can’t reach those who’ve passed on (like I said there’s no time), but because the earthly client has so much emotion that I won’t be able to hear clearly. It’s not saying you have to be a zombie, quite the contrary, but when you’re grieving it’s harder to calm your energy and that plays a big part in me listening. For me that’s a challenge on not to feel your pain, as in my prior life I was a Neuromuscular Massage therapist, go figure. I always wondered why I did that career path, but now I realize it’s due to my natural ability of being an Empathic. I feel, literally people’s energy. From my head injury I have to decompress from interactions with people. It’s not like I want to be a hermit, it’s that I have to space apart the time and the amount of time I share myself with others. It’s a delicate balance as I’m learning and it’s all good. So just like that, is what I’m talking about being emotionally charged. It’s all balance, and if you’re in a grieving place just try and be there and not judge that you should be better or somewhere else. When the time is right to get a reading, it will be right, trust yourself to know. Also if you want the clearest reading possible as your guides and relatives to help you and meet you at your appointment. They’re always waiting for you to ask, as you have free will and nothing can triumph that.

Q: What do spirits look like?:

A: I can only answer this from my perspective, as with all questions. For me there’s different types of spirits and how they show up are different.
As for Angels and Baby Beings I usually see light orbs, swishes… They’re sometimes 3D with encompassing color or just pearl like. Sometimes they zip around, looking like fairies in the wind or hover over people, or my computer. Note, I had someone tell me they saw light beings/orb and they couldn’t understand why is it when they try and look directly at it they can’t see it as it’s usually in the peripheral. This used to happen to me in the beginning, as I thought I was also going crazy and was scared something was wrong with my eyes. Then I just accepted it to be real and through that, I could now see them all the time even spot on. So I believe you see them peripheral because the brain isn’t paying attention to justify or question it. As soon as you ‘think’, it usually goes away. It’s just called being human and still believing we only have 5 senses. Just roll with it.
As for Spirit Guides, this was a personal one. There’s many different ways to connect with your spirit guide, one being drawing he/she out on a piece of paper. Here you’re activating your right side of your brain and allowing without knowing anything. It’s the beginning of becoming an Intuitive. Spirit guides come in as a ball of light sometimes bigger, yet sometimes they come in as how you drew them on your paper. Just search the word; spirit guide and you’ll get a wealth of information on it.
As for People who’ve passed over I usually see them in many different ways. Sometimes light beings/orbs, sometimes I would get an actual outline of them like you would see a ghost, sometimes I would get to see them in full color but like a cloud (I usually see this when they’re showing me something that needs healing in their physical body), and sometimes I would see them as dark smokey pillars that come down like some Star Wars movie. This is when I realized it doesn’t matter how they appear, it’s all good.

Q: I heard having a near death experience or tragedy facilitates intuitiveness?:

A: It can, but it’s not needed. Any type of experience in life whether you label it good or bad is just an opportunity to pay attention, to widen your perspective. Even an argument, even a ceremony. Everything in our life is for our growth, as the famous Bryon Katie so eloquently says, ‘Everything happens FOR you, not TO you’. So to say that my experiences facilitates me doing Mediumship, well I have to say they helped. It was a choice on my part. I was tired of fighting against what was. I surrendered and in that I was able to feel and express who I really am and what I’m really capable of, as we all are.

Q: You talk about those who’ve passed over like their right here and not in heaven?:

A: It’s because they are everywhere. Heaven (in my awareness) isn’t a place. As they say the veil is thin, it’s like that. It’s not saying they’re here on earth cleaning up your yard, it’s more like they’re on another plane of existence. It’s like there are many different wave lengths like radio waves, and we’re here on one wave, and they’re on another. This is why I believe we can see them, literally. It’s like when people see ghosts AND energy usually works well through other energy especially phones, computers, lights = electrical. So for me it’s not literally here in my home typing to you, yet they’re making their energy known to me, as they are everywhere even with you simultaneously as how else do you think I can receive this information. Sorry skeptics I’m not on Facebook researching you, as I don’t care that much. So for what I’ve been shown through my near death experiences is that it wasn’t like most people describe, yet it was the most love you could possibly imagine and honestly the mind can’t even process that love as it’s so beyond our comprehension.

Q: I’m scared of death and dying.:

A: I was once too, until I had near death experiences and other traumatic events. As they’re all great opportunities to let go and just live. Through my experiences I’ve found that death isn’t what we’re really afraid of, it’s suffering and believing the thoughts we’re thinking about death that scares us half to death, so we don’t live. I got the opportunity in 2011 to be bedridden for about 3 months, it was like a head injury all over again. Through this time I fought it, cried continually, prayed in sheer desperation, and basically threw a month long temper tantrum. As my body was molting, my egoic mind would do whatever it took to save itself and boy did it try. I was desperate. As my beautiful elder neighbor says to my dogs; ‘you’re a mess’ and they happily beg for more treats. I was a mess to put it mildly. I was convinced I was dying and I had the body/mind to prove it. Through that time of suffering, something shifted in me that gave me another choice. A choice to surrender. Now just to clarify I’m a feisty Sagittarius with a moon also in Sagittarius, so surrendering is usually my last option I’ll take. But there is was, no pretty bow, no warranty package, just surrender and see what happens. Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, so I did since I was tired of being ‘One who stands with Fist (Dances with Wolves woman)’. Once I did surrender, I’m not going to say it was sunshine and roses, quite the opposite. But once the dust settled down, I was able to breathe again. One day at a time I took it, and I questioned all my thoughts through lots of different processes, yet the one that stood out was ‘The Work by Byron Katie’ (see Awareness link). I found that first of all, I already died several times whether it be ‘near death’ or just going through a different cycle in life. Second it’s not bad as the mind makes it to be. It’s like blinking. You don’t realize you’re already going through it, as it’s that graceful. Third it’s only scary because of your thoughts attached to it. Here’s the thing a lot of people who’ve passed over normally won’t answer me on how they died for that exact reason; it’s just not that important. That’s a ‘human’ thing to make it important, even suicide, even murder. Just like they don’t tell me about their birth, they don’t harp on how they passed. Some of them won’t even budge when I ask/plead with them on how they passed, they just won’t let the recipient focus on it as their life here wasn’t about that, even if they suffered. Through their suffering came great wisdom not just for them, but for all of us. Life isn’t about it being perfect, it’s about being present and accepting everything given and seeing the beauty in it all.

Q: How do you receive your information from my loved one whose passed over?:

A: Well, like I said previously somewhere on this website, I listen. It’s not through hearing (sometimes it is), but it’s more like thoughts. The work is to constantly put aside my left side of my brain so as not to judge or really even question or hear what I’m receiving. Sometimes it will appear I’m really dumb, like I will get your name coming through yet I won’t be able to comprehend that, till afterward. Then it will be a ‘duhhhhhhhh’ moment :).

Q: How can I understand what I’m receiving?:

A: Usually it takes a while to comprehend everything as when I get my information it comes really fast and jumbled. That’s why I like to do it via instant message so I don’t have to hear more questions while I’m listening. It’s just a little easier for me, as I LOVE to hear your stories and validations that you have from your experience, but when I’m connecting with those who’ve passed over, it’s like being on the phone with a huge family reunion and listening to you too. It’s kind of difficult. So this is why I offer my readings online via instant message, not only does it slow the whole process down, you can go back to the reading any time you want and reread it. You’ll get a lot more information once things have settled.

Q: How do I know that there still around me or do I need you to tell them I said hi?:

A: Knowing they’re always around you when you want them comes from asking and feeling. Like I said they can be in two place at once, as there’s no such thing as time or physicality. All you have to do is talk to them, in your mind. If you want answers, ask and then be quiet to receive. It’s hard to quiet the mind, but what I usually tell people is just trust the very first thing that arrives in your thoughts. As long as you don’t make it a story, then it’s accurate. Btw you don’t need me to connect with them. I have a lot of people say to me, ‘Can you tell so and so I said hi and I love them?’. Fact is you can, just say it in your mind as they will hear it loud and clearer from you than they will me.

Q: Do you hear voices all the time and when you’re doing my reading whose talking???:

A: I don’t hear voices all the time, except my own since I can talk and talk and talk. 🙂 I actually made the mistake a while ago of asking prior to a reading the next day of if they want to come through into my dreams I welcome any information to pass on. BIG MISTAKE, as doing that you’re really open when you go to sleep so in the middle of the night, actually around 3am-4am I awoke because I was being screamed to. Apparently they (ones who’ve passed over) didn’t think I was listening and thought they had to yell at me, till during my dream I told them to slow down and spell it out. Then I sat up in bed and if anyone knows me, I sleep like a bear, so I sat up and had to say aggressively out loud, “Enough! If you want me to listen to you stop yelling and meet me at the appointment because I’m tired!”  Then I plopped back into a slumber as my husband stares at me while confusion on why his insane wife is propped up in bed yelling to thin air. So basically I do hear voices but I make them make an appointment also. When I’m doing a reading whose talking? Well usually there’s a ringleader who brings everyone on stage and passes the mic around, but mostly there is one person who does all the speaking on others behalf because they’re the easiest for me to understand, also this coincides with them usually being the closest in relations to the person receiving the reading.

Q: Am I required to know my family lineage?:

A: No and yes. You don’t have to know anything as they will give you the information as you’re able to receive it. If you have a family tree, read over it prior to the reading and then you might get even more information, but it’s really not required as whose coming in isn’t really as important as we believe it is. It’s perfect however it is.

Q: What ‘tools’ do you use in facilitating your conversations with those who’ve passed over?:

A: Tools are just one way to strengthen your belief in what you’re doing. Some use rosary beads for prayer, some people say mantras, others meditate, some pray looking at statues lighting incense,  some people use crystals. Fact is whatever we do, it works for us because we believe in it. Just like medicine or surgery, it’s been proven that it’s our belief in it that makes it work, or not work. I heard this through Wayne Dyer, as they did a study about the power of belief. Several people needed surgery for their knees, so they went in for work to be done. Some people got cut open and they fixed what was the matter. Other people with the same problem went under the knife and they couldn’t find the problem so they did nothing. After they were out of surgery both groups of people said their knees were GREAT, even the ones that didn’t have anything done to them. That’s the power of belief. So for me I use tools when they present themselves. Sometimes it’s crystals, sometimes sacred geometry healing cards, sometimes this fairy ring around my head that’s supposed to center my being so it doesn’t get magnetically pushed around supposedly. No matter what it is, it’s just my belief in it that’s all.

Q: I’m sacred to get a reading as this is my first time, what should I expect?:

A: Well don’t expect for my head to spin around. There’s no woo-woo stuff going on at least not on my end. All it looks like (if you get a reading in person which is rare), it looks like I’m having a conversation with you, yet I pause to listen for the answer. Sometimes on online readings via instant message, it may appear I’m not there but I am, I’m just quieting the mind so I can listen for the response. It’s looks pretty boring actually. If this is your first time for a reading, or a reading with me as your Medium, please go to the Mediumship link so you have an overview of how it all works.

Q: What if my loved ones speak a different language than you know? Can you hear them?:

A: Yes. This is such a common question, but if you look at the question more closely you’ll see that it’s coming from the limited minds perspective. You have to remember that I don’t hear using the ears. Sometimes I do, but not in the whole of it. So when I do readings and there’s a language barrier, how your loved ones are speaking, are not through words plus it’s all going through my spirit guide. Kind of like a translator, but yet again it’s not through words, it’s through feelings. So if I give you a ‘sounds like word’ and you’re trying to figure out if I mean it in English, or another language you speak remember that it’s not to be taken that literal. It’s just a sound I’m hearing so it would be whatever language you’re used to. They’re coming in giving you messages that YOU’ll understand, not me. So that’s why I say again and again you have to be the detective, yet the more you ALLOW the information to come the easier it is. It’s work on your part, but not how you normally listen. You have to open yourself and allow the critical overworked left brain rest so your right side of your brain can open and allow the information through. Just remember it’s not literal, it’s feeling based.

Vanessa Wishstar Intuitive Medium
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