Is your Sensitivity beating you up?
Own it instead of being blown to bits by it. It can be crushing or it can be freeing.
Our natural instinct is to control it, by controlling what’s happening. But when we do this we actually lose some of its magick in its arrival. We try to fit into it! Don’t! It’s not meant for a box – 4 walls, you’re much too big. This is expansion.
Your sensitivity is showing you the value of not fitting in. Not making sense of everything but still retaining that there is a bigger understanding. Your sensitivity is permission granted without needing to ask. Your sensitivity is loud at times beckoning your attention while other times it waffles as if it were a choice.
It might crumble your plans, but chances are they were built on a false foundation without your authority. Your sensitivity is actually your Source. You don’t need protection. We’ll strive for it, we’ll seek to control it, we’ll prepare and plan. But your sensitivity is foolproof. You see, it doesn’t ask permission, it IS permission. It’s flow. It’s your natural state. You don’t attain it, you allow it. We’re all sensitive. Ironically enough, through my practice I’ve noticed boys when young are actually more sensitive than girls. I feel that’s why nature gives them such high doses of testosterone, as a form of natural protection to skip over the mind. Your sensitivity calls you to listen beyond comprehension. And when you really hone it, you can operate in a smart way. But for the time being, you’ll react to it. Your reaction might come as pain, suffering, ungrounding, anger, will force, sureness, needs, etc.
I say to my young Capricorn son, “control your emotions, so they don’t control you.” I used to cringe saying this, feeling its harsh complexity, until I understood what it’s about. Yes, I intuited it, but still. “Control your emotions (E=Motion), so they don’t control you.” Otherwise you’re going to feel yourself spiraled out and it takes even more energy to return to center.
How do we do that?
We honor our sensitivity, making no apologies also no excuses.
Let’s take an example. We’re feeling beat up by another’s projection. We can’t allow this person to tornado through our lives, thrashing us without even touching. We gear into action by trying to do something about it! So, we try talking, empathizing, and setting boundaries. We naturally want to calm and demystify their behavior to rein in peace. Yet it’s only us who’s not peaceful. It’s only us who’s feeling jarred, triggered, nauseous. Our sensitivity is our GPS, it’s for where we’re going forward, not another. Listening to this inner voice, if we choose to use the Messenger’s offering instead of protecting against it it might be just that – our medicine! “Don’t do the Universe’s job” instead do yours. Your job is to heed the message.
Message to Self: Get back into my body whereas I was being lured out into another world. Breathe, reset myself, get really present. Am I in any immediate danger? No. Then I can let this play itself out, watch as if I’m in the audience, noticing how it makes me feel. Chances are the ‘instigative jeseter messenger’ is not to torture me but help me clue into what I haven’t been honoring about myself. So, what do I do? I RADICALLY love this part of myself that is in stark contrast to what’s in front of me. Only through this contrast will I be able to see what needs real attention. Nobody but me has to be this way. So, I chose me!
Find where you can be peaceful, when chaos pours instead of trying to calm the chaos. Find where you can love yourself even when you literally don’t have time to – do it on the fly. Try not to control anything/anyone in order to give love to yourself. Don’t wait for a good time, don’t reason it, don’t try to be more or make it more, just give yourself wild acceptance in this moment and others. Do it in the now, even if that ‘now’ is sitting in the loo to receive your summoning. Your survival is worth it.
Next time someone says, “your so sensitive”, say, “thank you!”
Spiritualist Psychic Medium & Writer